One Closet, Two Pits
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: Pit and Dark Pit both get trapped in a closet together, much to their dismay. A request.
1. Chapter 1

"How did we end up in this situation?" Pit asked as he groaned, feeling cramped.

"Because you wanted to get that floating vanilla cupcake, you idiot!" Dark Pit snapped back angrily as he also felt tight.

Pit and his edgy, black clone were trapped inside a closet together, with Dark Pit having chased Pit as he wanted a rematch for the embarrassing match. Both of the angels were trying their hardest to get out, but they just couldn't.

"Ugh... you stink." Pit groaned as he pinched his nose with his left hand, waving the air with his right hand. "There's such a thing called a shower, you should definitely take one!"

"I would if it weren't for the fact that I wanted to beat the living hell out of you!" Dark Pit growled as he punched Pit in the face, taking a whiff of his right arm pit as he gacked, coughing as he waved his left hand. "Ugh! Man, that stinks!"

"Yeah! I know!" Pit remarked as he felt his stomach grumbling, gulping as he placed his hands on his stomach. "Uh oh... those bagels I got from Luigi are coming back to haunt me!"

"What are ya, pregnant?" Dark Pit remarked as he folded his arms together, shaking his head as he scoffed. "Stop being melodramatic over your stomach being fat!"

Pit groaned as he closed his eyes. "You don't understand! You know what happens when a bagel hits you-" He then opened his eyes in shock as he let out a loud, brassy fart, blushing as his wings dropped, blushing slightly. "...Whoops."

"And you complain that I stink! Jesus!" Dark Pit stated as he began coughing, the closet getting smellier as he began pounding on the door, screaming for help as Pit slowly sunk to the floor, his arms wrapped around his stomach as he felt bad.


	2. Chapter 2

"Have any of you guys seen Pit?" R.O.B. asked the various Smashers in the giant living room as he shook his head.

All of the other Smashers glanced at each other, then back at R.O.B. as they shook their heads in response.

R.O.B. let out a disappointed sigh as he shook his metal head. "Just what I feared. He must have gone off and done something tragic..."

"Actually..." Pichu remarked as she walked by R.O.B., munching on a piece of cheesecake. "There was this vanilla cupcake that was floating by, and Pit really wanted it, so he chased after it."

"...So I see." R.O.B. replied as he then headed to the security room to see the footage of what took place within the mansion, with Pichu continuing to eat the rest of her cheesecake.

* * *

Back in the closet, Pit and Dark Pit were still groaning as they felt cramped, with Dark Pit having attempted to scratch his way out of the closet.

"Argh, damn it! If only I went to talk to Wolf, I could have gotten awesome claws to slash and tear with!" Dark Pit cursed as he then slammed his fists onto the door.

"You know, did you ever think of doing it without acting so violent?" Pit suggested as he had his arms folded together.

"Shut up, Poot! I don't need to hear anything from you!" Dark Pit snapped as he glared at Pit.

Pit sighed as he frowned, opening his eyes. "Dude, I keep telling you, cramped spaces make me feel gassy. I just can't help it."

"You've been hanging around with that gassy, green haired goddess of yours too much." Dark Pit remarked with a glare as he folded his arms together. "Where the hell is she, anyway?"

Pit sighed as he rolled his eyes. "Knowing her... she's probably enjoying this predicament that we're stuck in..."

* * *

Indeed, Lady Palutena was enjoying every moment of Pit and Dark Pit trapped in the closet, treating it as if it was one of her favorite daytime soap operas, being at her temple by herself as she was having a feast invoking all different sorts of food.

"Oh my, this is too enjoyable." Palutena admitted while giggling, munching on a cheeseburger. "I'm so glad I can hear these things despite not being involved."


	3. Chapter 3

Pit's stomach growled as he whimpered, with Dark Pit growling as he glared at the famished white winged angel.

"What are you crying about now?" Dark Pit snarled as he had his arms folded together.

"I'm hungry..." Pit whined as he stared at Dark Pit, his eyes getting big and wobbling as tears started forming in them, his hands on his rumbling stomach.

Dark Pit just closed his eyes as he shook his head. "Ugh, you're such a dick sucker for food. You'll do anything to eat."

"Yeah, how did you know?" Pit remarked as he stood up, holding his hands together as his eyes began sparkling.

Dark Pit scoffed as he glanced at Pit. "I've heard tales from the other Smashers. The lengths you would go to eat is ridiculous..." He then smirked as he snapped his fingers. "But... they could provide us for our escape..."

Pit stared at Dark Pit with confusion as he felt his stomach rumbling, with Dark Pit trying to think of a good excuse to have Pit get both of them out of the closet.

* * *

"Dude, Pit is totally gay. Have you noticed that he acts girlier by the day?" Rayquaza laughed as he was having lunch with Petey Piranha and Ridley.

"Yeah! I bet that angel boy just likes taking it up the ass! It's his sort of thing, rargh!" Ridley squawked as he flapped his giant pterosaur wings.

Petey mumbled grunts in agreement as he made a joke, with both Rayquaza and Ridley laughing as they all had a good time in the boss lounge. R.O.B. stumbled into the room, turning his attention to the three giant Nintendo bosses.

"Excuse me, but I couldn't help but overhear you guys mentioning Pit." R.O.B. stated as he approached the trio, raising his metal arms. "Have you any idea on which closet they were trapped in?"

Rayquaza and Ridley squinted their eyes as they glanced at each other, then at Petey, who just shook his head in response with a frown. The two reptiles looked back at R.O.B.

"How should we know? We're not his managers." Ridley stated as he flapped his wings.

R.O.B. sighed as he lowered his metal head, shaking. "Look, if one of you is willing to help me out, I'll be kind enough to let you have a reward for-"

"_I'm in!_" Rayquaza stated as he zoomed out of the room, grabbing R.O.B. with him. The dragon Pokemon came back in to say goodbye to Ridley and Petey, who waved goodbye in advance as he then left again, with R.O.B. letting out horrified, electronic beeps, his eyes fizzling and turning green.


	4. Chapter 4

"Man... I wanna go home." Pit whimpered as he began sobbing.

"We are home, you idiot." Dark Pit snapped as he rolled his eyes. "Of all the idiots for me to get trapped in, it had to be with you."

"Hey, don't insult me, Pittoo! Cause you'd be insulting yourself!" Pit pointed out as his stomach grumbled again. "Ugh... and I'm still hungry."

"Don't remind me..." Dark Pit sighed as he placed his right hand on his face. "You are such a sucker for food..."

"What can I say? I'm a big eater!" Pit stated, chuckling as he realized that he just Baneposted.

"Great. Now he's not going to stop spouting memes..." Dark Pit bit his tongue as he banged his head on the wall.

"Was making me feel better part of your plan?" Pit suggested as he stopped sobbing, with Dark Pit pinching him on the right ear.

* * *

"Hey Dry Bowser, have you seen the two angel boys?" Rayquaza asked as he and R.O.B. were inside the library.

Dry Bowser, who was dusting off the furniture, shook his boney head in response. "No, I haven't. What am I, there caretaker?"

"Well, you did babysit Pit that one time..." R.O.B. suggested, lowering his metal arms.

Dry Bowser scoffed as he left the two, with R.O.B. and Rayquaza looking at each other.

"Well, guess we'll have to try elsewhere." Rayquaza stated as he picked up R.O.B., mega evolving and turning into Mega Rayquaza as he zipped out of the library,

causing the books to fly right off the shelves, with R.O.B. holding on as tightly as possible.


End file.
